Long post alert. You were warned. Who else *struggles*to practice what you preach?? 🙋🏼♀️ Got news today at the doctor that I was really just pissed about and then it spiraled from there. So many feelings of “this pregnancy is getting in the way of my ability to achieve.” I’m not physically able to do as much as I “should” be able to do. My self worth diminishes at the sheer thought of having to “take it easy” (wtf is that?!). I feel frustrated that I have to take medicine that’s going to make delivery more complicated and possibly cause her to have to stay in the hospital longer. I feel angry that my body is bleeding and no one can figure out why. In my mind, this is why I’m having my babies young - because this is what my body is meant to do at this age. Then why is there complications? I don’t have time for complications. I have sh*t to do. •
But underneath all of these thoughts is the fear that if I’m not achieving something significant every single day, I don’t have value. As a lifelong achiever, there is always this feeling that you need to earn the space you occupy. Growing a baby simply doesn’t feel like “enough”. And though I’ve always been an achiever at heart, after being with a partner who constantly affirmed “you’re not enough” & “you’re not doing enough or achieving enough” those thoughts sometimes take up waaaaay too much space in my mind. Yet five days out of the week, I sit up in front of a class and I see nothing but beautiful souls filling the room. I lead them through a yoga practice all so they can come to savasana at the end of class and literally do nothing but breathe. I remind them that they are enough, just as they are, there’s nothing more they need to be doing, that just by being present they are doing enough. I want them to be able to just “be”. To rest from the need to achieve. To know they have worth, value and deserve to take up space and to have a voice not because of anything they’ve *done* but simply because they are divinely created humans. This is why I teach. Because I want everyone to know they have worth and they have value, even when all the achievements and accolades have been stripped away. Post finished in comments
